I have experienced somewhat of an epiphany. And I'm going to share it with you.
I've only spoken very lightly on my past struggle with an eating disorder and related anxiety. I spent a solid four and a half years constantly struggling with negative body image and dysmorphia, thoughts of purging and self-harming, restriction, obsession with losing weight and exercising; the list goes on.
I went through therapy for four months - something I never thought I would do. I lost so much weight, including muscle mass, it was hard for me to do anything for long periods of time. I was constantly freezing. My lips were blue, even in the summertime. I wore a sweatshirt everywhere I went, and I had trouble getting to sleep at night.
Living every day of my life that way, constantly tormented by an inner voice that nagged at me, telling me lies about myself and urging me to continue down the path I was going. The path that could very well have brought me to my death. The path I have no intention of ever looking back on again.